Cat Sims

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Penalty.

How could this letter not allude to the football in someway? It’s been the perfect storm. After 16 months of misery, it could be that the England team and Gareth Southgate bring football home and, along with it, a much needed boost to the national morale.

But, there’s something else that I love about this story. It’s not just a tale of success and wins (hopefully); it’s really a tale of the power of failure. For a long time, I’ve always encourage people to embrace failure. I don’t believe there’s such a thing as the ultimate failure and therefore I believe you should take risks, put yourself out there. Sure, crashing and burning is never fun, but it’s also just a moment that will, eventually, like all things, pass. But failure is also an opportunity and there is no better example of this than Gareth Southgate.

Remember how we hated him when he missed that penalty in 1996? I mean, we didn’t hate him, but we kind of did. Not that it matters, because at that moment, he hated himself more than we ever could. It was, he admits, the single worst moment of his life. He never really recovered from it and to this day it’s a burden he carries.

But here’s the beauty of that penalty: the success he is seeing now, and the success that the England team are currently enjoying wouldn’t be happening if it wasn’t for that missed penalty. When he missed that penalty, it wasn’t just a bad day at work; it was a day of national mourning of which he was the central focus. It was every newspaper, every radio discussion, every interview. Southgate couldn’t move for being reminded of how he let the whole country down.

But that penalty made him into the man and the manager he is today. It humbled him in a way nothing else possibly could have done. It made him kind, compassionate and determined at some point down the line to right the wrong he never really forgave himself for. That missed penalty was the cornerstone of the success we see now.

So, remember this: no matter your failures, chances are they probably aren’t as painfully spectacular as Gareth Southgate’s was in 1996 and, never forget that they’re probably all part of a bigger plan. A failure is a gift if you know how to look at it.